There is a particular distance from Allah that is hard to name. You have not stopped believing. But something has accumulated โ choices you regret, a slow drift. And it feels like the distance is too far to cross.
This feeling is common. It is also, according to the Qur'an, a misunderstanding of who Allah is.
"Indeed, Allah loves those who constantly repent and loves those who purify themselves."Al-Baqarah 2:222
He loves those who constantly repent. Not those who repented once. Those who return. Repeatedly. The Arabic word tawbah literally means to turn back. You can turn back as many times as the turning away happens.
The Prophet ๏ทบ made istighfar seventy times a day. Not out of heavy guilt. Out of continuous orientation toward Allah. Tawbah is not a single dramatic moment. It is a practice. A posture.